How to Release the Need to Be Perfect — Nicol Heard
How to Release the Need to Be Perfect
Perfection: that impossible standard so many of us cling to, hoping it will keep us safe, loved, and acceptable.
But here’s what I’ve learned, over and over—perfection doesn’t protect you. It suffocates you. It clips the wings of your truth and weighs down your freedom to live.
If you’re ready to release the need to be perfect and step into the rawness of your humanness, this is for you.
Where the Perfection Story Began
Most of us weren’t born needing to get everything right. We learned it.
Maybe you were praised when you excelled — and shamed when you didn’t.
Maybe you felt safer when you hid your mistakes.
Maybe you were told “good girls don’t…” or “real men always…” — and the mask took root.
Perfection became your silent bargain: “If I just do it flawlessly, I won’t be rejected.”
Why Perfection is Heavy
Perfection keeps you performing.
It whispers that your worth is conditional—tied to outcomes, productivity, and approval.
It cuts you off from the present moment and feeds anxiety about the future.
And worst of all? It tells you to hide the very parts of you that make you real, relatable, and deeply human.
How to Release the Need to Be Perfect
Here’s what I teach my Messy Leaders—and practice myself daily:
Name your perfection voice.
Catch it when it says “not good enough,” or “fix this before they see.” Awareness weakens its grip.Let good enough be enough.
Perfection is brittle; real life is fluid. Choose completion over endless tweaking.Invite safe messiness.
Share a truth you’d usually polish. Laugh at a mistake instead of covering it. Let someone in before you’ve figured it all out.Ask your Intuitive Self: What serves me here?
Often, your intuition will show you that honesty and presence matter more than getting it “right.”
Your Permission Slip
If you need someone to say it, You're allowed to get it wrong. You're allowed to change your mind.
You're allowed to show up unfinished and still worthy of love, respect, and trust. Perfection is the heaviest thing you don’t need to carry anymore.
Ready to Drop the Mask?
This is exactly what we practice together in my free Clear the Fog Circle—a safe place to leave perfection at the door and reconnect with your own clarity.
Want deeper freedom? Explore The Messy Temple—for women ready to live and lead from wholeness, not performance.
Your Heart's desires are non-negotiable, and your life should not be lived as a compromise."
-Nicol Heard
Email: nic@nicolheard.com.au
© 2025 Nicol Heard Coaching | All rights reserved
On Wadawurrung Country, stretching from the Great Dividing Range in the north to the southern coast and from the Werribee River in the east to the Surf Coast in the west, we honour the Traditional Custodians of this land, the Wadawurrung people of the Kulin Nation. We pay our deepest respects to their Elders, past, present, and emerging, and acknowledge their enduring connection to the land, waters, and community. We also celebrate the rich stories, culture, and traditions of all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander Elders who live and work on this land.